The key facts
- Excessive self-criticism lowers motivation and self-esteem and increases anxiety — psychologist Maria Gavrilyuk
- Instead of fighting yourself, she suggests acknowledging the critic's intention to help and changing the tone of the dialogue
- Guilt about leaving work on time is linked to team attitudes where overtime is seen as dedication to the job
When self-criticism does harm
The inner critic is not an enemy in itself: it helps you notice mistakes and grow. The problem arises when strictness toward yourself becomes excessive — then, according to psychologist Maria Gavrilyuk, constantly devaluing your own achievements increases anxiety, undermines self-esteem and drains motivation. The expert gave her recommendations in an interview with Vechernyaya Moskva, as reported by Life.ru.
How to change your inner dialogue
Gavrilyuk advises not to fight the inner critic, but to acknowledge its intention to help and mentally offer it a more friendly way of communicating. “I suggest you be my friend. Let’s keep doing the same things, but kindly”, she said, giving an example of addressing oneself. The desire to improve remains — only the tone of the inner dialogue changes. Regular self-support, according to the specialist, gradually strengthens confidence and a sense of self-worth, helps reduce anxiety and move forward with self-respect.
The connection with the work environment
The psychologist also touched on a related topic — feeling guilty about leaving work on time. As she explained, it can arise from attitudes within a team: where overtime is seen as proof of dedication, it is harder for employees to allow themselves rest. Thus, excessive strictness toward oneself and a culture of overtime reinforce each other, and working on your inner dialogue concerns not only your personal life but also your attitude toward rest.
